September 15, 2026
Okay, I know the Bible is direct about this: “Pride is before a crash, and a haughty spirit before stumbling” (Proverbs 16:18, NWT). So consider this my one exception. Just this once, let me brag a little. There’s a point to it, I promise. 😅
I’m not a genius. I’m not an overachiever. But somewhere along the way I picked up just enough sense, skill, and a little bit of brains to get by, even when I hadn’t prepared at all.
Back in high school and college in the Philippines, I was one of those students who’d walk away with top marks without studying. My secret wasn’t really a secret: I just paid attention in class, when I wasn’t dozing off. That quiet confidence grew during a college Calculus midterm under a professor known for failing half his students. I came in late, slept through part of the lecture, and still ended up one of only 5 out of 30 students who passed. To be fair, I was decent at maths, logic, and problem solving. Other subjects didn’t always go so well.
Still, that mindset stuck: I can walk into almost any test and come out fine, prep or no prep.
Then came the Civil Service exam. I spent the night before playing games instead of reviewing, and still landed in the 11.42% who passed (25,090 out of 219,679 examinees, if you want the exact numbers).
Fast forward to now, years removed from any kind of formal studying, and I pulled a Band 8 on the IELTS with maybe five hours of prep, total.
It’s the same pattern in other parts of my life too. I lean on confidence. I trust that I can usually figure things out as I go, and that trust has quietly convinced me I don’t need to prepare as much as I probably should.
I wrote a shorter version of this thought on my /now page after a recent half marathon:
I have a tendency to rely on confidence. I know I’m capable, I know I can usually figure things out, and sometimes that makes me think I can get by without putting in as much preparation as I probably should. That works, until it doesn’t.
That race is what finally made the pattern click for me. And once I saw it in running, I started noticing it everywhere. A few small, easy-to-miss examples:
None of these look like a problem on their own. That’s what makes them dangerous. They’re small enough to seem harmless, but stacked up over months and years, they shape how I move through everything, including the things that actually matter.
Scripture has been pretty direct with me about this one. Proverbs 21:5 puts it plainly: “The plans of the diligent surely lead to success,” while anyone who rushes ends up worse off. And in Luke 14:28-30, Jesus points out that no one starts building a tower without first sitting down to work out whether they can actually finish it. Preparation isn’t a lack of faith. It’s part of taking something seriously.
So that’s what I’m working on: being more intentional, even in the small things. I know it won’t be a clean, straight line. I’ll probably slip back into old habits more than once. But I’d rather take small, imperfect steps toward something better than keep coasting on confidence I haven’t earned yet. Recognizing that we’re actively working toward something better, even slowly, even imperfectly, is already worth something.
If you’ve read this far, thank you for sticking with my sappy little life story. If there’s one thing I hope you take from it, it’s this: confidence isn’t the enemy. But when I let confidence replace actual preparation, it stops helping me and starts working against me. I still believe I can figure most things out. I just don’t want that belief to be the only thing I’m relying on anymore. Confidence can tell me I’m capable. It shouldn’t be the reason I skip getting ready.
I don’t think I’ll ever fully shake the urge to just wing it. Maybe that’s fine. But I’d rather be someone who’s capable and prepared, than someone who’s just gotten by on confidence so far. January’s race will tell me a lot about which one I’m becoming.